Short and Plain

I would like to know: Precisely how many seconds does it take a judge to resolve a case like Dixon v. Bush? I mean from start to finish: intake, reading, typing the opinion, sighing resignedly...
A Mr. Ernest Dixon, who has crossed our path before, sued First Lady Laura Bush for $40 million. Mr. Dixon dutifully explained in U.S. District Court in DC that:

"(she) has helped tear down (his) apartment building" in New York City and has "built her a building there."

On Tuesday, U.S. District Judge Ellen Huvelle dismissed the suit, https://ecf.dcd.uscourts.gov/cgi-bin/show_public_doc?2008cv1845-3 explaining that it failed to include the necessary "short and plain" statement of the claim. Although, I get the feeling the plaintiff's explanation might end up being very long and very complicated.